KIMCHI CUDDLES

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Lady: “I don’t understand how you could share real COMMITMENT with a partner if you aren’t monogamous.”
Kim: “Well, I think of any type of relationship model as just being a different shape of container for sharing connection, and people gravitate to the ones that are easier for them to fit into. So no relationship strategy is inherently going to foster deeper connection or commitment, but whichever one is your preference will help you feel safer to fully pour yourselves into…Commitment is just an ongoing interest in returning to a particular connection, but we can’t force our future selves to WANT that, no matter what promises we make about it now. I’m committed to sharing AUTHENTICITY rather than SPECIFICITY. And that might sound precarious, but I find myself nurturing deeply fulfilling relationships over decades of time when that is the shared focus. And that is something that can happen with or without a monogamy-shaped container.”